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intollerance
trolls
xenozenphinity
There's no good way to tell your family you've married a Satanist. I've come to realize this. Even the Playboy method doesn't work. Playboy suggested that when you're introducing a significant other of a different religion or race to your xenophobic family that you first announce your significant other is of a different religion, different race, and the same gender. That way your family will be relieved when they find out the other two weren't true. It should work even if only the gender thing is true, that same sex thing is generally the real clincher in our homophobic society. The conversation should go like...

on the phone
you:I've met a wonderful new person, but it might take some getting used to, see he's a palestinian and he's Muslim.
family: he? palestinian?
you: yeah, we're coming over for dinner tonight.

at dinner
you: This is her, I was just kidding about her being a palestinian male
family: Boy, we were kind of worried for a moment there...
---
This doesn't work for Satanism though....

you:I've met a wonderful new person, but it might take some getting used to, see he's a palestinian and he's a Satanist.
family: Satanist?
you: yeah, we're coming over for dinner tonight.

at dinner
you: This is her, I was just kidding about her being a palestinian male
family: So you're a Satanist huh?
---

With my dad I could announce I'm brining my gay skinhead lover to passover and they'd still trip on my satanic wife. Does anyone else have the problems I have or am I alone in this?

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No, I don't have any similar problem. Well, they did look a bit askance when I mentioned that my wife worships Larry, the Burning Head of Lettuce, but nothing like what you're probably going through.

Hey, I could always come along and pretend to be your gay Baptist Republican boyfriend. That'd go over well. Be a hell of a stretch for my acting abilities.

I can just see me now, running around shouting "Praise Gawduh" and "mind if I borrow your eyeliner?"

that would really throw 'em for a loop, wouldn't it? Well, at least it lightens my mood a bit... the whole religion thing has really been getting on my nerves lately. My family doesn't even know I'm agnostic and the whole "we must save this sinner" mentality of the church makes dealing with that crap...well..annoying.

Glad to lighten the mood. You going to be on campus this week?

You know where I'll be. Yep, my latest replacement editor said she's outta there.


I'm working for KUSD, we have something big coming up and the tech staff needs to be working overtime... which brings up something interesting. Do you know who Monty Roberts is? The horse whisperer guy... Anyway, apparently his ideas have been applied in some british school to the students and the results have been incredible. KUSD is trying to do the same thing district wide. I understand they'll be the first district to do this.

This comming Tuesday ABC news is coming, and I guess some others. It's a major news event and you should show up and get the whole story. I could probabbly get you a full recording of the audio, if not the video.

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